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Andaleeb (III)

              The girl had received the letter a couple of days before.  It was delivered by a travelling merchant selling herbal remedies. The old man’s smile created a nervous knot in her stomach, and she quickly hid the yellow envelope under her dress. The sun turned the dust in the street into glitter, and Andaleeb ran to take shelter in the shadows of her bedroom. From there, the shouts of the old man selling his miracle cures were almost inaudible.
 
             The letter had been hand written by Assef himself. The deep impressions on the coarse pages bore testament to this, even before she could see his signature at the end.  Such a gesture was highly unusual, and she felt extremely honoured to have been granted such respect by her master. It wasn’t just a regular note that contained only a date, a time and encoded details of the location.  The letter was a symbol of his admiration as he bade her farewell.  It contained the sweetest kiss from those lips at war: “ I don’t need to explain anything to you, my beloved girl, because you know all the details of the plan so well. Nobody but you deserves the paradise, the eternal glory of those who die for their people. God is guiding your steps, my young soldier. Simply follow the way, just as I have taught you”. At the end, he had signed his name in beautiful letters, which she would put under her pillow, to remain there forever.
 
               It wouldn’t be easy to execute the plan, a plan that was taught and repeated with an endless melody of whispers during their training sessions. Any small detail in that perfect plan could easily be overlooked, and Assef concentrated on showing her those points where success or failure depended upon God’s will alone. Going to the hiding place in the old city wall to collect the sleeveless pullover, filled with explosives, and the small time-delayed detonator were risky, but easy tasks. This she did with a simple precision and firm resoluteness. Waiting for the time to pass during the day - waiting for the moment to arrive without attracting any attention - wasn’t a problem either. The real dilemma, the puzzle that only the sacred intervention of God’s own breath could solve, was to exit the Territories and reach her destination: the city centre. If she didn’t achieve this objective, her destiny would be one step closer to her:   an ending headed for Paradise, leaving behind her the wreckages of military domination.  Nobody has ever said that peace is easy to attain.
 
             But today was a very happy day for Andaleeb, and fate had decided to join in on the festivities. As she was walking amongst the soldiers, looking for an opportunity to escape the military confines without anyone noticing, she pulled the handbag containing the Book of all the Answers closer to her chest.  Fighting the lump in the stomach, she noticed a jeep pulling up beside her. The piercing, bold voice of the driver’s greeting hit her memory powerfully and in an instant. There was no time for being afraid.
 
 “Andaleeb!”  He shouted.  “What a surprise! What are you doing here? This place is crazy!  How are you? Are you going to the city? Jump in, I’ll give you a ride, then you don’t have to wait in the queues.  How is it going at home? How’s your Dad?”
 
“They’re all fine, thanks, Jacob. It’s great to see you again!”
 
     How is it possible that her friend from childhood could now be her enemy in the forces?
 
“Wow, Andaleeb, look at you!” He said. “You’re beautiful! How are things?”  He chatted away merrily while they drove.  “I’m finding it really hard to cope here. The circumstances are really hard.  I’ve lost touch with all my friends from the Territories. I miss them…” He continued “I hope to see your Dad again one of these days….. Where do you want me to take you?”
 
“To the market, please, Jacob.   I want to go and buy my mom something… a present, for her”

             The jeep must have had strong shock absorbers, or else it was the flickering of the Sun reflecting on the guns of the soldiers, but Andaleeb wanted to throw up again.  She clutched her bag even tighter to her chest, but that didn’t really help her to calm down. She was betraying Jacob. He was still looking at her, the sweet and happy little girl who loved playing with the other children. He was looking at her, the young teenage girl who used to cry in front of the TV as she watched the tanks and corpses. And she was betraying him.